It has recently come to my attention that not everyone is as sensitive to the fact of my loss, and this blog, as others are.
People can sit there and scoff at the fact that I am doing this, and accuse me of writing this blog for attention, but honestly, I AM.
I AM writing this blog for attention. Attention for my daughter. For all of the people who have been through something similar. To let them know you are not alone. For the people who haven't been through something similar, to let them know this can happen those least suspecting. And lastly, for me. To help me work through my grief. To try to come to terms with what happened to me, and to seek supporters.
So yes. It is for Attention THANK YOU VERY MUCH! You can disagree with it all you want, but it's not going to change what I'm doing. Serenity was a LIVING BREATHING PERSON, and should be treated as such. If you don't like how *I* am reacting to the death of MY daughter, you can click on the little 'x' in the top right-hand corner of this window. I don't want readers who are going to judge me for how I am choosing to grieve. I mean it is MY choice, right?
On another note
Serenity,
The weekend before last was race weekend! How fun! NOT! Nascar, what a great excuse for loud unruly people from all over the continent to come to a very small town, and bother all of the residents! Yeah, you can tell I'm not a fan, huh? Lol, I did have a good weekend though. I watched Kar for the weekend, and Aunt Donna & Mike came down for the races. We cooked out and Donna and I drank Bloody Marys. They were sooo good!
During the weekend, I cracked one of my molars, then half of it fell out. So Tuesday, I went to the dentist and got my tooth pulled. He had a hard time getting it out, but after 12 shots of lidocaine, I didn't feel a thing.
That was almost a week ago, and my tooth still hurts.. I am pretty sure I have dry socket, but lots of Aleve & Tylenol should keep me afloat for awhile. If it gets any worse then I don't know what I'll do.
Okay, in the state of Alabama, usually when or before you go for WIC pick-up they assign a mini class. You can take this class either online, OR you can come to the office early and that the class. Either way, class + quiz. If you do the class thingy online when you get finished with the quiz, you have to bring them a code so you can pick-up your next 3 months worth of vouchers. The classes this time around were about breastfeeding and non-breastfeeding. Why should I have to read the literature, and take the quiz about these things when I never got the option to do these things.
So I wrote this letter to the people who handle WIC for the state of Alabama:
Hi, My name is Cally Rawson.
I am a recipient of the WIC program, and have been since about March of this year.
I had my daughter in July, and she passed away 7 hours and 34 short minutes later, due to premature birth.
I also recently had to renew my WIC. I had to take the same Nutritional Education courses that a mother with a living breathing baby does, yet I don't have one. This is a mandatory course for someone who wants to continue their WIC for the allotted 6 months, after they have their baby.
Is there anyway to come up with an alternative course, for the many like me who doesn't get to bring their babies home?
Please take my request into consideration. It will be very appreciated by me, and all the other mothers who are still receiving WIC after their baby's untimely passing.
Thank you.
Cally Rawson
This is the reply I received:
Ms. Rawson,
Personally and professionally, I offer heartfelt sympathy to you and your family for your loss.
I apologize for the action taken by the local WIC clinic in asking you to complete nutrition education that was inappropriate for your situation.
Please let me know the clinic where you are a participant, so we can offer guidance to the staff.
Thank you for letting us know.
Jean Fulton
Jean Fulton, MS,RD
Director, Nutrition Services
Division of WIC
Bureau of Family Health Services
It made me so happy to get an immediate response, and it also made me feel like I accomplished something for me and everyone else who is going through a similar tragedy. Maybe nobody else who has to visit the same clinic I do, will have to take the course when it has been deemed inappropriate by the director or nutrition. This made my day. :)
I love you Serenity and you life, as short as it was DID have a purpose! :)
It's in his heart
8 years ago
4 comments:
I am sure a small part of what I am about to say comes from me having lost Savannah, but a BIG part of what I am about to say comes from my connection with you Cally, and my love for YOUR beautiful Serenity.
I AM APPAULED THAT SOMEONE WOULD DARE SAY THAT TO YOU!! APPAULED!!
Shame on ANYONE who has such a black heart to voice their negative opinions on a grieving mother! Shame on you!!!
Cally, CONTINUE writing to your girl! I know that you wouldn't stop writing on behalf of a person who OBVIOUSLY hasn't been faced with a loss of this magnatude!! You write to that precious little soul for as long as your heart needs and wants to! These babies that are taken away from their mommies all too soon have EVERY RIGHT to be made into HUGE deals! I will forever read what you have to say to her. And I will find comfort in being an outsider looking into a mother's deep and divine love for her daughter.
The world is a cruel place. This I know from my own experiences with the death of Savannah. We don't write these blogs for the negative... we only write them for the positive. To find ourselves in the tragity that life has left us. Don't give us the attention if you don't agree with what we are doing.
Just know Cally... those people are each going to have to face the mistakes they make in the end. Just keep moving forward sweety, you are doing wonderful!!
OMG who the F would say that kind of stuff to you??
Nobody *SAID* it to me, it's just the way someone acted to someone I know, when they said I made this website for Serenity. She didn't have to even say anything, just she didn't have to look at it, and especially act rude about it to someone I am close it.
It didn't really hurt my feelings, because that woman is NOT worth 5 seconds of my time- BUT I just wanted to set the record straight.
I can't believe someone would say that..even someone who hasn't lost a child..that's just cold...You, or anyone else for that matter have the right to express your loss in anyway you choose. As you said, if they don't like it..then DONT READ IT!
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